Two Ply Sentence

No longer do you see any of our able-bodied prisoners working on literally reconstructing their lives, but rather they are learning the fine art of paper mache - a key skill we should all foster, should the urge to whip up a giant paper mache forest troll for the backyard suddenly hit.

If you find yourself admiring some of the more historic structures in your city, chances are they were all made possible by criminals. Thats right - that lovely old stone bridge you walk over everyday or the cathedral you kneel in on Sundays, could all possibly be the handiwork of theives, rapists and boy-racers (in an ideal world, of course).  

You see, in the 'old days' hardened criminals were'nt given a room with cable, gym facilities and a well thought out diet-specific menu.

Going to prison meant doing time - not 'getting away from it all'. If you went to prison, it meant you weren't going to enjoy life a whole bunch.

Now I'm not saying we should start thinking about regressing in terms of human rights - we have certainly come a long way since Joan of Arc landed on the barbie. It just seems to me that we seem to be getting rather soft in the name of political correctness. Two ply kind of soft. 

Nope, these guys are now servin' time making toilet paper.

What kind of criminals are these ? Were they put away after stealing candy from a baby?

And I have to ask the question: How do they get the paper so thin? Did they have a lot of of spare pasta machines that were simply collecting dust? These are serious questions. Is there someone who has the dedicated task of putting in the perforations?

To be honest, I think it would be great to see these guys out in the open, working on some big project. Sure there would be some logistics to work out - you know, so we dont have them escaping and all, but I think under the right circumstances it could really work.

Toilet paper is fundamental, we know this, but wouldnt you rather have a cool cable car in your city than prisoner made bog rolls ? In lieu, so to speak.