Base Balls in the Sky

Base Balls in the Sky

Two days ago, the company started installing security cameras all over our building. They are like white baseballs hanging from the ceiling with a moving camera hidden inside. Now wherever you go, someone is watching your every move – your every bum-scratch, your every nose-pick. I’m glad I got my spoon out of this place when I did – imagine being caught stealing your own property – shameful.

These little bulbous eyes everywhere made me think of two true stories I have been fortunate enough to have come across in my lifetime. Both of them involve the thwarting of bad behavior thanks to these base balls in the sky and both, oddly enough involve urine. Yes, this is indeed a strange world in which we live. . .

Story one:
A manager goes away for a day on business.
Upon his return, he finds a foul odour of urine in his office, and embarks on a nose sniffing mission to find out the source. Imagine his surprise when he finally finds himself standing at his comfy office sofa!
Imagine his further surprise when he discovers a wet stain on one of the cushions!
Wisely, he had installed a hidden camera in his office (for situations just like these) and consulted the video archives of the day.
As it turned out, he found himself watching in disbelief as his secretary walked across the small TV screen, across his office to the sofa, pulled down her knickers, and squatted on his sofa.  SCANDALOUS! And so she was duly “relieved” of her duties.
I presume she was peed off about something.

Story two:
The second story is a real account from my student days at a prominent university in South Africa. It reads very much like a famous crime solving boardgame: Mrs Peacock, with a bottle in the library.
The story runs as such:
The university library has a special climate-controlled room in which all the very old manuscripts are kept. These books are OLD – 300 years and older, and every time you enter this special enclave, you feel a sort of respect for these artifacts. You can smell the age in the musty air.
One particular day however, one unsuspecting student got a call from nature while browsing through the books in the psychology section. But, instead of heading for the bathroom, as any normal person would, this woman decided she would take her chances in the old book room. That’s right; she cramped her way down the aisles and darted into the revered old book room.
Once inside, she ducked into one of the darker rows of 500 year old books, and whipped out? An empty cool drink bottle. Yup. Cool drink bottle.
Delicately, she must have positioned herself over this vessel and continued to relieve herself. How she didn’t spot on the carpet is beyond me.
Little did she know the little baseball in the sky was recording every second of her relief, and needless to say she was confronted after she had emerged from the reading room with a full bottle of freshly squeezed orange juice. . .

Any stories involving hidden cameras? Keep them rolling.